“Well fuck you then! Ugly bitch!”

Alan sat in his black pick-up and released a billow of cigarette smoke.

Another advance.

Another rejection.

Another dose of bitterness.

“When you’re sixty, you’ll be begging for this attention!” He drew in another cloud, inhaled, and then quickly exhaled followed by a chuckle.

A bleached blonde with oversized, gold-framed sunglasses marched along the side-walk via his wing mirror. He planted his forearm on the vehicle’s window frame and smiled as she grew in the reflection and sped past.

“Hey, babe. Great ass. My dick would be Excalibur in that: Unable to pull out.” He cackled and ashed his cigarette on the outside.

The blonde stopped and gave a slow pivot on her heels. She removed her sunglasses, glared at Alan, and dawdled towards his door.

“Tell me that again.” She tucked her glasses into her unbuttoned floral top, jostling her tanned mounds.

“I said gre-”

“Stop. I just wanted to see if you were man enough to actually repeat,” she said with a neutral face. She yanked her yoga pants up, placing prominence on her plump vulva, and placed her hands akimbo.

“What? Of course, I’m man eno-”

“Shut up.” She hoofed it around to the passenger door, opened it, and hopped into the seat next to him slamming the vehicle shut.

“Whoa, lady listen, I didn’t really mean anything by it. I was just goofing off ya know?” Alan said with one hand up and a nervous chuckle – dumping his cigarette and edging further away from her.

“That’s the problem with men like you. You never mean what you say and back down as soon as things get a little too heated right? Take your dick out,” she said with both hands rubbing her thighs vertically and cocking her head to the side.

“Are you fucking nuts? I’m not doing that! I don’t even know you!” Alan furrowed his brows while still pressed upon the door.

“Pussy.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re deaf too? I just called you a pussy. What’re you gonna do about it you pathetic, balding fuck?”

“Hey fuck you alright. I ain’t no pussy.”

“Then whip it out. And don’t say I don’t know you again, because that didn’t stop you from making your crude little comment before.”

“I...”

“Oh fuck this.” She launched her palms onto his pants and unzipped them. Alan stared into her eyes with his brows still furrowed and mouthing what the fuck on repeat.

“Okay ma’am, this is a pretty busy street and you…you shouldn’t be doing thi-”

“I don’t understand you clowns. You waste your life hollering at women and harassing them on the street but now that one is giving you what you want, you’re filled with excuses. Your windows are tinted…roll them up.”

He swallowed and did as commanded, with beads of sweat on his forehead and a racing heart. An erection was growing at a measured pace as she pulled it out and stroked.

“Hmm, not a bad size. A shame it’s wasted on such a pathetic excuse for a human being.” She gave him a slow, two-handed tug and maintained eye contact while staying emotionless.

“Jesus Christ that’s good.” Alan reclined and closed his eyes.

The stranger released her grip and rolled her yoga pants down revealing a clean-shaven vulva with tanned legs to boot.

“Oh no, you don’t get to relax. Come over to my seat,” she said – reclining it first – rising from it and allowing him to ease over the centre console and into it, “Now make yourself useful coward.” She straddled his face after he settled into the passenger seat.

His eyes bulged and he mumbled under her suffocation. She gripped his hair at the sides and ground her cunt on his face. Up and down. Side to side. Circular motions even. Cackles soon rattled the pick-up’s interior.

“Grab my fucking ass, you idiot!”

He grabbed and squeezed her plump derriere with haste and continued mumbling while being stuffed with an overflow of clitoris, lips and juices.

“Fuck…I’m gonna cum in your fucking mouth.”

She held onto the sides of his head and squeezed as her orgasm crashed and broke against his bearded face. Afterwards, she turned and scooted down to his softening organ. A glint of light reflected off her asshole and she glanced over the shoulder, licking her upper lip.

“Is…that a butt plug?” Alan asked panting and wiping his mouth. Slow blinks were almost at normal frequency again, and he re-focused on the light bouncing off of the polygon jewel lodged in her behind.

“Yes, and you’re gonna take it out and replace it with your big cock,” she said raising her eye-brows, “Can you do that or you still a little pussy that can’t back up shit he says?”

“Fuck are you talking abo-”

“You said you wanted to bury your cock in my ass like Excalibur. Well…here’s your chance to do it. To do something meaningful with your life you ambitionless prick.”

“Whoa whoa, what the fuck do you know about me to say something like that huh?”

“Asks the loser throwing lame pick-up lines at women at eight in the morning. Don’t you have a job…loser?”

“Just take the fucking rubbers out of the cubby and put one on… fucking cunt.”

She opened the cubby hole for the condoms and Alan took this opportunity to gaze at her wobbling cheeks and greasy cunt lips. Blood flooded his organ again and her bejewelled asshole gazing back and begging to be packed with his meat allowed for extra stiffening.

“Here.” She flung the box and he caught it in front of his face. “Do it yourself.”

“Trying to put out an eye now?”

“Hurry up and get it on loser. I got places to be.”

“Like where? The looney bin?”

“None of your concern. Put it on.”

Alan cussed and fretted while unboxing, unwrapping and rolling down the condom. She reached into her bag on the floor in front and pulled out a bottle of lube.

“Unplug my ass, pour some of this into it and then re-plug it with your cock,” she ordered.

He clutched the edges of the polygonal plug and eased it out of her butthole. It sucked on it while exiting and popped when freed.

“When you’re fucking my ass, reach around and rub my clit too. Don’t think only you’re gonna get off on this action buddy.”

Alan slapped his beefy cock against the stranger’s pink ring and poured some lube into it and the length of her crack – some on his shaft too for good measure. He glided it along her slippery crack before pushing his mushroom-shaped glans against her star. With slight pressure, the tip slipped in and the rest plumped and bulged until half of it disappeared. Veins popped as she rocked on his lap and slapped the dashboard.

“I thought I told you…Jesus. Reach around and rub my clit moron!”

“Alright alright! Fuck!”

He fiddled about and stuck a finger inside of her pussy, then used the moisture to caress her clit. Clockwise, then anti-clockwise. Four fingers flattened and strummed her clit and entire vulva as she whimpered and cussed.

“Goddamn you, you misogynist pig.” The stranger lifted her feet off the floor and planted them on the seat, squatting on Alan’s veiny, bulging cock. “Rub some more of that lube on my butt cheeks. Not the hole, my cheeks. Got it?”

“How could I pour more into your ass if my cock is already in it? Do you think I’m fucking stupid?”

“Yes. I’ve made that very clear a few times already,” she said while shaking her head and slapped his thighs.

“I really fucking hate you,” he murmured while pouring and massaging more onto her plump cheeks.

“Good. Take it out on my asshole, man-let.”

“That makes no sense; I’m six-foot-three. Your insults are losing their steam hon.” Alan grinned sarcastically and raised his brows.

“Oh just shut up and cum in my fucking ass!”

Alan cupped his hands behind his head and took in the bout before him. The battle between a shiny pair of bouncing buttocks and a gleaming schlong was on. It was a back and forth contest and neither side held control for very long. Lube splattered off his lap with every bounce and her f-bombs got louder with each utterance. She kept looking over her shoulder at him with clenched teeth and a widened grimace. Continuous rubbing of her clit unlocked said grimace and her eyes rolled white as the bouncing accelerated.

“Jesus Fuck!” She collapsed on his chest and squirted a torrent against the windshield. It splattered and bounced against the dashboard and on them as well.

“I can’t believe you did that. Who’s gonna clean this up?” Alan whined.

“Umm… your truck, your responsibility,” she panted and resumed her squatting position.  She clutched the safety bar and dashboard while crashing and splattering her heavy buttocks against his lap. The bout’s end was approaching as his manhood bulged, tore through the condom and exploded into her fat bottom like a broken dam.

“Fuck yeah! Fucking take all of it bitch!” he bellowed and grunted with protruding eyeballs and a stiffened neck. After his sack completed its drainage, his neck fell back and gasps from his open mouth decreased in volume until reaching absolute silence.

“You know you actually came in my butt right? I didn’t literally want you to do it; I wanted it in the condom.”

“What fucking difference does it make?”

“What fucking difference?” she asked mockingly, “Now I have to walk around with cum in my ass you idiot!” She lifted off of him and he flopped out of her along with a few globs of semen.

“Not my problem. You attacked me remember?”Alan picked up wipes from the centre console and cleaned himself off, then offered her the package. She removed several of them and cupped under her backside as more semen dripped out.

“This ain’t gonna catch all of it,” she said while moving into the driver’s seat, “This is gonna take forever.” She lifted a cheek and squeezed more into the wipes.

“Tell ya what,” Alan said while zipping his pants up, “Pop that butt plug back in there and that should help. Problem solved.”

“Whatever. Anyways loser; same time tomorrow?”

“You have got to be kidding me.”

“I don’t kid motherfucker.” She bit her bottom lip as her asshole sucked the jewelled butt-plug into its original nesting place. Alan threw her yoga pants at her and she caught them one-handed and stepped into them. Afterwards, she collected her handbag, opened the door and turned towards him.

“Welp,” he said and then waved, “this is goodbye ya crazy broad.”

“Luna. And this isn’t goodbye, weren’t you listening? I told you we’re meeting here tomorrow.”

“Riiiight, okay. And is Luna short for Lunatic?”

“Oh my god, that was so hilarious.” She covered her gaping mouth and feigned laughter.

“Bitch.”

“See you tomorrow… loser. Oh and stop harassing women on the street will ya?” She slammed the door and strutted off, stopped mid-way, looked back, slapped her rear and pushed up a middle finger. His scowl turned into a smirk and hers did too. Then she continued her strut, and after the corner, Luna disappeared.